Whale Meat Again?

It’s been a sad week for all animal lovers.  When I heard that a huge mammal had to be rescued from the Thames, my initial reaction was to ring up McDonalds to check that the wife was OK.  Unfortunately, the creature in question was a northern bottle-nosed whale.  Bloody trouble making Northerners. 

On a brighter note, there’s money to be made on the weekend FA Cup football.  Opposing Arsenal away from home this season has been a nice little earner; that trend looks set to continue as the Gunners visit Bolton.

The week started well for Wenger, the Arsenal board splashed out 12 million pound on an exciting teenager, that’s more than Mark Oaten.  The feel good factor quickly evaporated as a defeat at Goodison Park was followed by Carling Cup heartache.  Arsenal were easily beaten in Bolton last month; with Wenger resting Henry, Lauren and Campbell - another Reebok shoeing awaits.  Back Big Sam’s men at 5/2.

Paul Scholes has been ruled out for the season due to blurred vision, maybe my mother was right.

Man U could be in a spot of bother when they travel to play a side managed by tambourine banger Glenn Hoddle.  Paul Ince has no real opposition in the middle of the pitch, United are in poor form away from home and only an exceptional Reading team have left Molineux victorious since September.  The ingredients are all there, let’s put this bad boy in the oven.  At 13/2, the Wolves are ready to pounce. 

The match between West Ham and Blackburn will probably be the most exciting tie of the round.  The signing of Dean Ashton was expensive business, £7m for a Canary seems high (I can get my hands on a whale for a monkey), but quality costs.  These two have already met twice in the league; home advantage was the key in both games.  The form of Benayoun edges me towards West Ham; the signing of Ashton clinches the deal.  Pal up the Hammers at 5/4.

Stuart Pearce thinks it’s stupid to suggest he should be considered a contender for the next England manager, and if Psycho says it, I wholeheartedly agree.  A derby day win is a flimsy wallpaper for an out of sorts City; Wigan on the other hand are a lot like my wife, they refuse to lie down.  The Latics are a confident choice at 2/1, well as confident as you can be on a match that involves Man City.

In the week that the FA confirmed that Sven will not last beyond the summer, long time talking-horse Steve McClaren looks to be on the verge of receiving his P45.  The Boro team have been sent to Coventry to revive their season, it’ll be an unhappy trip.  Dennis Wise misses the tie due to a ban, taxi drivers throughout Coventry are appealing to the FA.  Get on the draw at 9/4. 

With Sven’s allegations of corruption hogging the headlines, I feel obligated to confess the following; Charlton’s forward line is completely Bent.  Marcus is cup tied, but Darren can win the tie for the Addicks, the weekend good things at 2/7.

 

There’s a handful of weekend specials, well a Jeremy Beadle handful.

“Back from the dead” – Wolves to win from behind      25/1
“Here O’s” – Leyton Orient to score one goal or more  11/10
“Stinging the Blues” – Reading to score in both halves    11/4
“Remember the Whale” – Wayne Rooney to score a hat-trick   16/1

 

Quote of the week:

“There wasn’t much in it, but he was clearly offside.”

Trevor Francis: the reason why a mute button appears on a remote control.